Lost colors
by Revan Sama
Summary: Younger Male Revan x younger Kreia,  Revan is 10 years old and Kreia 20 years old at the start of this story.
1. The sweet color of innocence

_Until this heart of mine stop beating._

_Until time and eternity has an ending._

_Please let this beautiful person by my side forever._

**Star War Knight of the old republic : Lost**** colors****.**

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...

A nameless young boy lived a solitary life.

He was a very beautiful child with long midnight black hair and bright silver eyes.

However for some unknown reason, no one wanted anything to do with the child. Even the orphanage didn't wanted him.

The child was quite strange.

And the fact that he had strange powers didn't help at all.

He could lift an object without touching it and many others oddness. Still, even if he wasn't well accepted, life was quite peaceful.

However, there were times where the nameless boy wasn't so alone. Because of his strange powers, he could feel and see things that no one else could.

He could felt whatever a person had bad intentions or not. Whichever it was glowing red aura like blood or blue like the deep opening sky.

It was always one or another.

Light or darkness.

However, one day...

To his utter surprise, he encounters a young woman, who had both light and darkness.

A very graceful and beautiful woman. He would look upon her, the defiance she wore proudly in her brown robes that clung to her body.

She possessed long brown hair and white eyes. Her aura was peaceful and tormented at the same time.

Day and night.

Sugar and salt.

Living and dead.

Impure and pure.

That person...

She know blood, death and darkness. Yet her soul is pure, absolutely white!

Completely neutral.

Who or what was she?

The nameless boy had never met such different person like himself and never though he would.

"So...You are this strange young child, I have heard of." Said the mysterious older yet young lady.

Even if he wanted to, the nameless boy couldn't answer her. Not because he didn't knew how to talk, he just couldn't. He didn't knew the reason himself.

Time seems to be flowing even thought they said nothing.

Suddenly, the lady decided to leave. As he felt a bit disappointed she asked him :

"...Aren't you coming with me?"

"...!"

This has taken him off guard. She wanted him to follow? He was allowed to come with her? It was a strange feeling - this subtle joy, a confidence in something more.

Snapping out of his reverie, the nameless boy rushed after her.

"You don't possess any name, do you?"

The child stared at her and slowly began to nod. For some reason, he felt shy around his companion.

The journey was always in silence.

At "home" (Like most of the Jedi would call the Jedi Academy), it was full of enemies.

Here, knowing the freedom of the road and the uncertainty of tomorrow, she had one ally who smiled and opened his heart to her without flinching.

It didn't matter if he couldn't or wouldn't talk.

Here, young Jedi Knight Kreia felt at peace.

"'Nameless boy' has...such hateful ring to it."

For just a moment, the lady, named Kreia, who's expression was always like an emotionless doll became filled with hate. Could it be she was angry?

But that hateful expression was immediately erased when she stared at him.

"Revan...From now on, your name will be Revan and you will be my apprentice."

And that's how the nameless boy gained his first name.

So begin the tale of Kreia and "Revan".

A little while after their meeting. Revan quickly became accustomed to living with his master Kreia.

She showed him how to use his strange powers and he learned that it was called the 'force'.

Although Revan was a bit too proud and arrogant about his powers and Master Kreia was very strict, they always were getting along.

And if they had fights they would reconcile right away.

Sometime, very rarely, Kreia would praise Revan for his remarkable skills for such a young age. As for Revan he would simply swell in pride.

_I want to be like her!_

_I want her acknowledgement!_

_I adore master Kreia!_

Every day was a new surprise.

Every day was a happy day.

But...

"Tsk..." A sigh of weakness. A broken glass on a floor.

Revan realized something about his master.

Her eyes were losing more and more their ability to see.

Kreia would say nothing about it. But Revan could see that it began to become more difficult for her.

There was nothing Revan could think of that he could do for his master.

And every time, at each training spare with either the lightsaber or the force, even thought it was rare before, master Kreia would say with a small smile:

"As expected from my student."

Even thought she couldn't see anything, she would still praise him.

While those words made Revan very happy, his tears would never seem to stop.

At daytime, Master Kreia is gentle.

At nighttimes, Master Kreia is cold.

They spent time together as always.

Just as Revan wanted, staying by his master side forever.

However...

Something became troublesome.

As Revan became more and more grownup each day.

The more he became adult, the more his feelings became deeper.

And it began to eat him up inside.

_There is no certain logic out there. Everytime I find in my mind that there is just what I am, that's stirred with confidence and insecurity._

End of first chapter.

_**Author note: Should I continue this? Am I not writing more nonsense like usual?**_


	2. The salty color of dread

_Almost feverish as my heart beat faster, I had no idea what that feelings was at first._

_The habit of averting my eyes, your ambiguous replies, and your laughable lies._

_All of those have meanings._

_Master Kreia..._

_Did you know?_

_I..._

_Despise of all your sins..._

_...I would die even to the thought of you not being by my side._

**-Star wars knight of the old republic : Lost colors 2-**

Those countless white lights create a place of beauty we don't deserve.

After our passage, nothing was left.

Like there hadn't been anything from the start.

All traces of life were completely erased.

The abundant fresh blood, the several Jedi corps.

We were Jedi renegades after all. The council wouldn't accept that.

In modern society, a Jedi who wasn't part of the Jedi under the Jedi Council was nothing more than a criminal.

A criminal who taint his hand for his own justice.

Whoever become a hindrance will be removed.

No better than a Sith.

Jedi or Sith.

What's different?

It's...

A duty that erases everything like there wasn't anything from the start.

Countless lives erased from the universe, to create a world of a beauty that we, who are stained with blood and responsibility, don't deserve.

And yet...

He, in this white space. He just stand here with no shame. Like he was here from the start.

He possess the innocence and the naivety I have long lost.

He has one thing that can win over the white of the snow and can't be drowned in a sea of blood. It is his own believe, stronger than anything else.

And it would be because of that, the council would erase all I stood for. They would see him as a something too dangerous.

And since it's a 'tradition' to not kill a prisoner, they will deprive him of all his power. They can, they will.

He look upon me with such untainted eyes, such strong trust he put in me.

I am older than him, but I am no fool.

It terrify me.

To possess such knowledge on his feelings is like having the heart of the force in my hand.

His heart...

This heart of his, that doesn't show any fear of being wounded. He entrust his heart to me.

I may taint my heart, my hands, my whole soul.

But...

His feelings...

Even if we cross seas of fresh blood.

His feelings won't lose to the white of the snow.

And that scare me more than anything.


	3. The sour color of sacrifice

_I wish we meet up again in former mind  
Then let's be hand in hand  
Till it's that time,  
"See you again!"_

**-Star wars knight of the old republic : lost colors 3-**

**Chapter 3: the sour color of sacrifice.**

The end of former life, the end of an oppression , the beginning of a new era, the beginning of freedom.  
The entire galaxy is shaking, the republic and the empire watch in silent the fate of the universe.

This galaxy filled with despair.

Feelings that can't be expressed.

Promises that hurts...

Those things were destined to be eternal, if the force were to continue its existence.

She wasn't a hero. she was considered as a Jedi renegade who lost all sigh of the light with no chance for redemption.  
A manipulating witch with no heart.

But he didn't care what the Jedi or the Sith could think about her.

She made his white painted world full of colors.

And made him feel the peace of the Jedi, the freedom of the Sith.

She told him once that he was the life of the force, its heart.

She...She said it with such a disgusted expression.

He couldn't understand at that time, why such a repulsion.

But now he could see it.

Master Kreia hated the force.

It very being was an insult to life itself.

A curse casted upon the universe.

A tumor infesting the body of the galaxy.

The reason why the Sith exist.

The Jedi and their new 'hero', the exile, were coming for her now.  
He wouldn't let that happen!  
Kreia told him to stay out of this.  
That it wasn't any of his concern.  
She said it so coldly...yet he knew what she was up to.  
Sacrificing herself to create a wound into the force...in order to destroy it.

Such thing...Couldn't be possibly happen!

He wouldn't let it happen.

He ran as fast as he could.

Only to find...

Darkness.

Blood, but not any blood.

The blood of the 'corrupted' master Kreia.

His eyes widen.

He cried.

He cried like a lost child.

Like the day he was born.

They were standing in front of him. The mighty and proud Jedi knights looked at him with pity in their eyes. Revan hated them, he didn't need their pity.

He glared at Kreia's killer, the exile, with such intense hatred.

And suddenly...nothing.

They could feel nothing.

The Jedi knights eyes widen.

The force was completely gone.

She did it.

It was the end of the Jedi and the Sith.

But Revan didn't care anymore, his entire world was shattered into piece.

Kreia's lessons became clear as water and bitter like blood.

A way to true peace without sacrificing someone...doesn't exist.

And for Revan, the price was too high.

_In my dark times, your gentleness has protected me...  
But even so...  
I won't be able to be with you like I promised._

END

Author's note: This chapter is so lame...I should write only when I have inspiration.


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